HOW TO OVERCOME NEGATIVE FEELINGS | Barbara Friedberg ...

Reflections on Life, Success, and Wealth

I don?t know about you, but there are times when I feel like nothing I?m working on is getting the results I desire. I diligently work at my goals and initiatives, I promise others that success will come with hard work, discipline and determination, yet occasionally I get frustrated and impatient. Although long term, I know success will come, sometimes I?d like to know exactly when a particular initiative will be reached.

A MOUNTAIN TO CLIMB

When the blues creep in, I remember this enlightening passage I read by one of the biggest publishing and internet successes, J.A. Konrath, author of The Newbie?s Guide to Publishing, as he writes about his rather slow publishing beginnings;

?1. Joe spends 12 years trying to get published, writing 9 unsold novels and receiving 500 rejection letters.

2. Joe gets published fulfilling a lifelong dream.

3. Joe is determined to do everything in his power to make sure he stays published.?

He goes on to profile traits of successful people; they?re hard workers, innovators, make sacrifices, and rely on themselves. Blah, blah, blah. How many times have I stated the same things?

WEALTH BUILDING

This essay totally relates to building wealth. Although some folks get rich really fast; win the lottery, develop a remarkable product and experience amazing sales, most wealth building takes a lot of time. As in most successes, outside observers notice the end result, not the arduous climb to the top.

Some folks check their net worth monthly. In fact, many of my fellow personal finance bloggers publicly report their monthly net worth or other financial details. Len? Penzo.com, one of my favorite bloggers keeps us regularly apprised of his net worth. Other regular reporters include Budgets are Sexy?and the online money bloggers?who detail their blogging income and strategies. Sunil at The Extra Money Blog?publishes screenshots of blogging revenue checks to verify the success of?his strategies. What is less obvious?are the hours, months, and years of efforts that financially successful folks put in. No one publishes their entire life, so those sacrifices and losses, that happen to each and every individual are rarely detailed.

I recommend checking your overall net worth annually (twice per year if you must). Don?t get hung up in the near term ups and downs, it?s the long term direction that matters.

I?m not suggesting you avoid staying on top of your monthly income and expenses, that is quite important. But to stress over the ups and down of your net worth is a waste of time.

I?m really lucky (and hard working), as over time, I?ve built wealth through smart lifestyle, career, spending, saving, and investing choices. And, I won?t lie; it is a wonderful feeling to have a financial cushion. But, I arrived at this position over decades, with many ups and downs along the way.

Be patient. One of the biggest money and life hindrances is to disregard your successes because they aren?t coming fast enough. You?re not finished achieving until they put the nail in your coffin.

EVERYONE FEELS?NEGATIVE FEELINGS?SOMETIMES

Regardless of your financial and life station, on occasion everyone gets down and thinks negatively. Who hasn?t said; I suck, I?m a failure, No one likes me, I?m not making any progress? Maybe you don?t get the promotion you desire, or your mortgage loan was denied, or you had a bad month financially. Or maybe you just woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Sometimes you feel crappy.

My mission here is not only to give you specific, actionable tips to grow your wealth, but also to help you grow your personal wealth. In reality, you can have a 7 figure net worth, but if you don?t feel personally rich and fulfilled, your life stinks. For those times when things aren?t going your way, and everything is getting you down, remember these strategies for getting personally wealthy.

Action Steps

Get a notebook and label it: ?(your name) Personal Finance? and keep it by the computer. Use it for all of your personal finance thoughts, activities, and plans.

1. Write down the positive?things going on in your life. Are you healthy, do you have friends and family; do you have personal strengths and skills?

2. Do something for someone else, and quit focusing on yourself. Go out and lend a hand to someone who has less than you. Help out and elderly neighbor. Phone a shut in relative. Write a note to someone going through a rough time. Give some food to a homeless person.

3. Realize the 10,000 hour rule. To become a success in anything takes about 10,000 hours. So whatever you?re working in, put in a bit more effort so you?ll get closer to those 10,000 hours.

There are times when your net worth goes south, your boss chews you out, you fight with your partner, and you feel bad. Continue to plod forward and put one step in front of the other. Make corrections when warranted and recognize that the evolution of life success is filled with a lot of ups and downs.

Barb across the blogoshere

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What do you do when you?re feeling down and overwhelmed?

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